The Birth Story of my little Chosen one.. Chosen Surrender

It still amazes me how much God is in control of everything. The more I have learned about natural pregnancy and childbirth and just how much God is in control of it (He really is in control of all of it) the more and more I decided to go a little more and a little more and a little more unhindered to the point the I have gone 100% unhindered this pregnancy. I have been researching and learning this for 6 years now and it blows me away how much God truly is in control of conception, pregnancy, and birth. It's when we mess with what God has such perfect control over that we often end up with unforeseen problems. So the point I was getting to. It absolutely blows me away that I have gone through 5 blessed pregnancies now and each time I have not a clue in the world when labor will start. Just as my little one is a secret in my womb so is the day that God moves. Just like it says he will come like a thief in the night and no one knows, well no one knows that magic moment when God moves and I will go in labor. I can't tell you the endless times I have had strong braxton hicks contractions and thought woooooooow I am going to go in labor soon! On my birthday this past September 29th I was having powerful contractions all day. It felt like the baby's head was just slamming down on my cervix. I really thought it was anytime, but I still had 12 days until I would have my little one. I always look for the plug, because if I loose my plug I know labor will start within 24-48 hours. I remember with Truth I lost my plug and I was leaping for joy! Maybe God knew I just needed to see that sign because I went over my due date by 21 days! Ohhhhh how I waited that time. With Honor and this little one though, God chose not to show me until I was well into labor. So I don't know when, until God moves. But it is just amazing how when God moves, he tells your heart it is time and you just know. I remember late Thursday night, the 9th of October I was getting these contractions. I don't know why I knew, because I had been having false warm up braxton hicks contractions for a couple months. But, that night I just knew in my heart it's coming. Then I felt God tell me when you wake up in the morning you will be in labor. I mean wow he told me! It was already late and I went to bed after 2am. I woke up in bed ( first greeted by all four of my children, like every morning in my room, they think it is the hang out place or something that's how you KNOW you are a mom! lol) and just knew with a knowing again from God that today was the day. I even declared it to my dear husband before I stepped out of bed. And sure enough when I got out of bed I noticed early inactive labor. You know the light stuff. You know you are in the beginning of labor before things get going. I was very tired from not getting enough sleep and dreaming all night about the fact that I would be in labor in the morning. So I got out of bed and said we need to get everything ready so we can have this baby! I called my friend who planned to come over to be a support to us with the kids and I. Aaron filled the birth pool up. I put any last minute things together for baby and got birth supplies lined out and ready.

At around 11:30 contractions were becoming regular and painful. I wasn't feeling super eager this time to "hmm do labor" and "push a baby OOOWWWT". I was very exhausted for the first time in 5 labors. Usually I am like Let's get it on! I am ready to have this baby! And shear excitement couldn't stop me! But, this time I wasn't in to it. I didn't feel ready for some reason. At first I got up and swayed my hips from side to side and did lunges with my legs from side to side. But, I quickly felt tired and sat on the ottoman with a stool in front of me. I knew to at least stay upright. With each contraction I swayed with the ottoman. But, quickly my contractions petered out. They were painful, but not close enough together to be effective. I thought ya know I am just not ready for this, I think i will just lay down take a nap and get going with it later. Ha ha yeah right! So I laid down and when the next contraction came it hurt so much I knew there was NO WAY I could stay in bed. Being in bed makes the contractions unbearable. So I got back up, got in the bath, and just sat there in a daze. In between contractions I got up and swayed from side to side to help my cervix open up and to help baby come down. I did this for a while. I also peed as much as possible as I always have that in my head pee pee pee. It is important not to have a full bladder. It can damage your bladder Or prevent baby when he is descending. I noticed the labor was painful already. . I asked Aaron to check me somewhere around this time. I just wanted to know if he could feel the baby's head and he said yes. I said can you feel the baby's heartbeat on her head? He checked again and said yes. He wasn't sure how dilated I was but he felt allot of head circumference.

I felt very weak and worn out early on. I quickly realized I would have a stalled labor where you are having hard, painful contractions not close enough together to have a baby unless you kept them coming. When I sat down on the ottoman my labor petered out just like that, so I quickly realized Oh boy if I want to keep this going I have to get up and stay up swaying from side to side with each contraction if I wanted to have a baby. If I didn't want to have a baby and preferred the stalled labor I would be in just as much pain, but I wouldn't actually bring forth a baby. This was around 2ish in the afternoon. I got back up and stayed up, yep you guessed it the whole time! This was discouraging for me, because I felt so weak and wanted to rest between contractions, not stand up between them. But, if standing up is what I had to do then standing up was what I was going to do! I realized I needed to pray and so I did. I honestly felt fearful that this was going to be a very very long labor and I didn't know how I would make it through standing the whole time, because I knew that is what I must do to bring forth the baby. I am not usually one who prays for things I want or says God change my life and make it easier, or God this is just too hard for me. Or God if it be in your will can I go have this? I grew up with a different mindset and early on I realized when I pray I want to pray for God's will for me, what He wants for me, not what I want for me. Because what God wants for me is far better and is sooooo much more perfect then any plan or desire I could ever come up with on my own. So I prayed Lord you know how long I need to be in labor, you know just what this baby needs to come out and just what my body needs to do to bring this baby. Please help me endure, give me strength to do this Lord. I am content to labor as long as you you need me to. I continued swaying from side to side. God constantly reassured me that baby was fine as he continued to move during labor in between contractions. I felt pain in my lower back and a pain down the front of my right thigh, which I knew was due to the baby's position. I went back in the bathroom trying to pee and very little would come out due to baby's position. I rinsed off in the bath again quickly. I asked Aaron to check me again (my cervix is always too high in pregnancy for me to check myself or i would) just to see if there was any progress as my water still had not broken and i had yet to see a lost plug. He said yes baby had come down a little more. I had another few contractions and felt sooo much pressure I almost thought my waters would just burst. I actually had the need to feel a P@P! Then they did brake! YES! This made me happy because I guess I felt progress. I checked to make sure waters were clear and no fowl smell. All was fine. I was still in the bathroom. Aaron was with me and was like wow,yeah when my water broke. I guess even he knew things were progressing. I went from active labor to transition in maybe three contractions, in maybe 5 minutes! Straight in the pool I went and the pain was so "electric chair like" that I just starting pushing. This is the part of labor I can't get out of my head even today three weeks later. Oh man it was something fierce. There was no hanging over the pool in between contractions zoning out getting ready for the next big one. It was so painful I couldn't even be there. So I pushed and pushed. Heck I pushed in between contractions ( I paid for this later!). I know Aaron knew it was bad because he was silently praying for me. It wasn't long at all. I reached in to feel my baby's head and he was right there. I knew he was right there and would be born soon, but not soon enough! I could feel his squishy head. Feeling his head helped me mentally to hang in there. Then came another contraction and I felt like I was splitting in two. I couldn't push him out fast enough. PAIN PAIN PAIN at the highest level imaginable! I felt the burning and kept asking Aaron is she crowning yet, is she crowning yet. I just wanted to get it over with. Sorry this birth is just not an easier one, it is just the higher level like you are being electrocuted or something. The pain is unreal. Okay yeah so back to the story. ROTFLMBO now, but it wasn't funny then... oh my goodness I am laughing out of nervousness! :-) So crowing does actually happen and the whole house knows it too by my sounds echoing!!!!!! ha ha ha I had desired for all my children to be at this birth like our last, but I couldn't handle the site of anyone! As I begin crowning and my brains are frying, I asked my dear husband ever so graciously as I always do ( you can ask him) HOOOOOOOOOOOOLD MY PERINEUM AND DON"T LET GO!!!!!!!! The thought of tearing, oh man! So he is there doing the best job ever! In the video later he is bent over and it looks like he is playing football and about to catch the ball!!!!!!! LOL! I am so ready to have this over that I keep asking is her head out? All the way? And he says I see her ears and nose and chin. And I just keep asking IS HER HEAD completely OUT? I just want to know so I will know when it is safe to push HER OUT and not have to worry about pushing when I am crowning so I don't tear. So finally he says YES completely out. Then the next race is on, thank God the hard part is over her head is out. Oh boy now brace down for the final showdown. I pushed again and she started coming out. He said Ohhhhh she is coming! I began feeling that huge relief where you feel your baby's body come out. Oh YEAH it's almost over!!!!!!!!!!!! Then he says she not all the way out, so I gave one more big push and YEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!!!!! She is out!!!!!!!!!! But it's a HE!!!!!! Again a little man child! He began crying so beautifully. I will never forget his cry. Beautiful, strong, precious cry. Aaron was holding him. I spoke out loud and you could tell he knew my voice instantly. Aaron handed him to me and I just looked at him in awe. He began rooting to nurse right then. He was so very alert. He had big lips like all of us do. I thought he was tiny, but we later found out he was a whooping 9 pounds 7 ounces! We quickly called for my friend because we noticed the pool water had cooled off. The water bed heater stopped working and the water quickly became cool. She handed us warm blankets to wrap him in. Aaron held the baby still attached to me while I was continuing to have contractions for the placenta to deliver. We noticed I was bleeding quick a bit right before the placenta came out ( placenta came out at about 5-10 minutes max after baby), so I took Angelica tincture. This helped quite a bit. We checked the cord to see if it was still pulsating and it was. We do not cut the cord until after it is done pulsing because we want baby to get all of his iron stores. His blood from his cord is valuable for him. As soon as the placenta came out we went into the bath and had nice hot water for baby and I. Baby enjoyed mommy time and nursed. My bleeding ceased and everything was fine. We stayed in the tub for 30-45 minutes and just enjoyed holding him and bonding. All the kids enjoyed seeing him. Horizon and Journey had cameras and took pictures of him and I. Dad examined the placenta to make sure everything was the way it should be. We noticed one small missing piece and that is probably why I had some heavy bleeding. The Angelica helped stop the bleeding and help the retained placenta piece to come away with no problems. Aaron then tied his cord and cut it. He weighed him, wrapped him in a blanket and dressed him. I showered off quickly, dressed and then sat on the sofa to enjoy my new baby. He nursed more and the rest of the evening. My friend had a wonderful dinner made for us and I was sooooo hungry after that and enjoyed eating a nourishing meal to recoup. I felt very weak that night. By the next day I was doing amazingly well and was surprised not to have soar lungs and everything hurting bad. No tears again and my third no tear 9 and 1/2 pound baby. My first vaginal birth was in the hospital and I tore with an only 7 pound 6 ounce baby, but my husband protects my perineum at home and three home births now and no tears and three very good size baby's. What does that tell you? I think I will stick with the protection of my husbands caring hands to deliver our babies.

Active labor lasted about 5 and half hours total. He was born with his little hand next to his face thus the extra pain. But, he was born healthy and he came into the world peacefully, into the hands of his father, born in the same room he was lovingly conceived in.

Chosen is very alert and he looks where he hears sounds and can turn his head from side to side to follow sound almost from day one since he was born. He tries so hard to hold his head up when he is up high on my shoulders. Now at 6 weeks he loves being on my shoulder and loves looking around.

We all adore him, but I notice a special bond his two brothers have with him. Truth at 4 and Honor at 2 can't seem to stay away from him. They loving kissing him and talking to him. Hi baby Chosen, I love you baby Chosen. They will be best buds I can tell already!

This was not the easiest labor. But, God was faithful just as he always is. I feel confident that had I been in a hospital I would have had a c-section due to failure to progress, due to being suck in a bed, due to not being given permission to listen to my body. For me it took listening to my instincts along with knowledge about birth and knowing what my body needed to do to have this baby. Yes it was very hard, but I feel happy looking back knowing my body was made to birth ,and I did it with God's Grace.

I listened to this song quite a bit before he was born and it reminds me so much of my mother except I was a little girl. I dedicate this song to my new son and for all my sons. May they grow up with a momma who tells them all about Jesus and may our heavenly father always live strongly in their life. My son is "Chosen" just as we all are by a loving Savior who thought of us before we ever existed and paid such a huge price for freely given Salvation if we but choose him back. Thank you Jesus...